video of the day: Marry Me

touching...

marry me from elvisdifazio on Vimeo.

video of the day: My husband's lover deleted kissing scene

Okay, I admit this is soo last year, but this is so worth posting :)

I miss eric and vincent ♥ :D

He’s getting married (Youngblood, Philippine Daily Inquirer)

this is from another blogger sublimestthings
tissue please :/



TODAY, I will attend an execution: my own. I will watch it with both eyes open and I will not cry. I will not break down just because the man I have loved since forever will marry someone else. I will watch him promise himself to a woman who will never love him like I have. I will watch them bind themselves to a vow I should have taken.

I have loved Oliver almost all my life. I have known him since I saved his six-year-old hide from a bully named Ricardo who wanted to rid him of his two yellowed front teeth. I was five at the time, but having grown with five older brothers and a hellion of a sister, ”Totoy Cardo” was a piece of cake.

Oliver was so overcome with embarrassment at having a girl to protect his scrawny neck that from that time on he made it a point to be the rescuer, not the rescued. As time passed, muscles filled out this lanky frame and those two front teeth began to sparkle. He combs his hair, and he takes a bath daily now. In short, he has become a fine specimen of manhood.

The best part is, he lived up to his promise: he became my self-appointed guardian (well, I don’t know if that’s the best or the worst part). He was just always there, sticking to me like glue. It used to drive me nuts that he never let me out of his sight.

When I was 12, I ran from the infirmary on my way home. I had found out in the most humiliating way that I had become a woman: there was a big red stain on the back portion of my skirt. The jeers and the taunts followed me through the school corridors. Oliver dashed after me and offered to accompany me home. I declined, of course. He seemed to understand my discomfiture and promised to drop later with the things left in school. When I reached home I was told that I needed to jump three times on the stairs (which I did) and to wash my face with my blood (which I didn’t do).

Oliver dropped by in the afternoon, sporting a black eye and a bruise on his arm. When I asked him what happened, he said he had walked into a closed door. I believed him. But a few days later, minus the dysmennorhea, I found out that Oliver got into fisticuffs because some guy made a disgusting remark about me.

Nobody had ever fought for me before that. And when you’re 12 and discussing in class how King Arthur and fairest of them all, Lancelot, fought for Guinevere’s love, you tend to get ideas. I loved Oliver then.

When we were in high school and I found out that the school’s heartthrob and one of my most ardent suitors, Richard, was involved with a bustier girl, it was to Oliver that I ran. When I didn’t graduate as valedictorian and I got so drunk, it was Oliver who took me home. He didn’t even mind that I barfed all over his dad’s car (which he borrowed without permission).

When I decided to go to UP and he went to Ateneo, we celebrated by partying. When I lost my mom in a car accident, he took care of everything. When my dad followed my mom less than a year later after a heart attack, he was there again. By this time he was an appendage of my life. He used to check out the guys I came to know. Nobody dared to get serious with me–not when Oliver had a black belt. I didn’t know how to define our relationship.

I didn’t know what we were. We definitely were more than friends, better even than best friends. It was like we were a couple, but formally not one.

We did all the things that couple did like hang out and neck but always stopped when things got too hot. Since we never defined what we meant to each other we never said ”I love you” or whatever serious couple told each other.

As a result, I remained a chaste princess while my prince caroused and sowed wild oats, but still had the energy to monitor my movements. I didn’t mind. After all, I was so sure we’d end up together. I always thought that in the end, it would be us. I loved him. I managed to convince myself that he loved me (what else could it be?). Little did I know that love doesn’t conquer all, it only conquers the weak.

I didn’t think he’d be so stupid as to get a girl pregnant on the same night they met at a party. I didn’t think he’d be so stupid as to forget to use some form of contraception. After all, he had given me a lecture on safe sex. And I didn’t think he’d be so stupid as to marry the girl. But maybe I forgot that after all he was a man, and men have been known to be stupid about these things. Their brain is located in a region other than between the ears.

What could I do? Kicking him in the groin and punching him in the eye seemed like a good idea then. Don’t blame me; he was the one who enrolled me in a self-defense course. But I did not feel better. Seeing him bent over in pain only made me angrier. I wasted my life for this lousy excuse of a man? I could not believe it! I wanted nothing more than to run to him and beg him to wake me up from the stupid dream. I wanted him to take me some place where we didn’t know anybody.

No pain, no memory, no humiliation. I wanted to just forget it ever happened but since I flunked in the School for Martyrs, I couldn’t, for the life of me pretend, it didn’t happen. I couldn’t pretend he didn’t hurt me.

I couldn’t pretend everything was fine and dandy and exactly the way it was before. We didn’t talk for a month. For both of us who were practically inseparable, that was like an eternity. I ducked into corners whenever I would see him. I wouldn’t take his calls. I wouldn’t see him. And for some time hate was my reason for getting up in the morning, for breathing, for living.

Hate and I became good friends.

“God brings men into deep waters, not to drown them but to cleanse them,” somebody once wrote. I didn’t want to be cleansed. I just wanted to drown in pain and misery and utter desolation. I wanted to wallow in the dark and deep pit of despair. I know a thousand and one clichés that say this can be a blessing and that I should be thankful. But thankful is the last thing I’m feeling right now. I’ve always thought that there are three kinds of women: those who break, those who mend and those who are broken themselves.

Before this hit me, I assumed that I belonged to the first or second category. Now I know I’m in the third–so hurt and broken up inside. My grandmother used to say that there is nothing you can do about pain when it gives you a silly grin except grin right back. All I could manage was a wry smile, a killer headache and the worst hangover the day before his wedding.

Evidence of that is the disgusting sight of mashed potatoes and barbecue, thrown up not three meters away from where I was lying prostrate on the floor and the awful stench of cigarette on my hair. Frankly I don’t want to go. I want to wallow in misery in my messy room, crying, retching and stinking, surrounded with Michael Learns to Rock (whose songs are dedicated to the broken-hearted) CDs. But I have to go and attend the wedding. I have to bathe and prepare and put on that atrocious peach (it’s not even my color!) gown.

I’m not doing it for the groom, my one true friend and love, Oliver. Neither am I doing it for the bride, my younger sister, Sandra who needs me. I’m doing it for my unborn niece who has the great fortune of having me as her aunt. Call me stupid, but I’ve always known my place. If it isn’t beside the man I was destined to marry, if it isn’t behind my sister, who will take his name, wear his ring and bear him a child, then it must be with my niece, cradled close to my heart so that she will know both of our love.

He’s Getting Married is a Youngblood article published in Philippine Daily Inquirer. Forgive me but I can’t remember the exact year when this article was published. It’s been a while since this article was published and I’m still moved every time I get to read it. This may be old but I’m still posting it here because it’s one of the articles that I like most among all the Youngblood entries I’ve read. Youngblood is a section of Philippine Daily Inquirer that publishes true-to-life story or experiences that the sender would like to impart to readers.

image from bridaldetective

The Dateless Gay Man: A Survival Guide

by Lex Bonife.

posted April 2008 by one my favorite blogger.
worth-reading : ♥
more at; http://lexuality.blogspot.com

(This article first appeared in Valentino magazine)


You chat. You party. You even try visiting the blue bars once in a while. But still, you don’t seem to meet the “right” guy that you would like to date steadily.

Has the gay market run out of “steady date-material” guys? Is the majority content with one night stands and quick gratifications? Or are some people doomed to be dateless for the most part of their lives?

The issue is not about sex. Sex has been quite easy for the gay men. It’s everywhere. It even comes cheap nowadays ranging from less than a hundred bucks to a few thousand pesos, given if you’re game for the flesh trade. And it can get a lot cheaper, especially if you’re willing to settle for a quick “orgasmic” fix inside dark parks, secretive rest rooms and your popular “raid-able”, rundown theaters.

But meeting that single and attractive guy, who would be willing to spend moments with you, whom you would proudly introduce to your friends and family and who genuinely shares your interests -- is quite rare in this lifetime (at least for me).

So I came up with a short list of “things-to-do” and “must-always-remember-stuffs”, every time I feel sorry that I’m dateless. I hope some of these things help, should you find yourself in the same situation.


· Being dateless is never a tragedy.

Even the most beautiful and most successful people in our society, whether straight or gay find themselves in a “dateless” mode at one point of their lives. So if you’re dateless, that does not automatically mean that there is something terribly wrong about you. Never feel bad.


· Image is Power.

Humans are primarily motivated by what they see. So, let’s accept it, we are judged with what people see from us. As date searchers, it is our primary duty to stay as beautiful, as healthy and as fit as we can get. Don’t expect people to have the patience to search for the inner beauty in you. Let it shine for all people to see!


· Do-it-yourself.
Discover the joy of doing things that are best done when you’re alone. Read a good book. Watch an art film and really think about it. Enroll yourself in a skill that you have long wanted to learn – photography, music or any sport. Being alone does not mean you have to stop growing and enjoying life. Never wait for the right guy in despair.


· Know your history.

Have you dated other men in the past? Did you enjoy these moments? How did you feel about these men from your dating history? If you have gone out steadily with men whose company you at least enjoyed, just remember, if it has happened in the past, there is still a significant probability that it can happen again in the future. So, if you have dated “great” men, there’s always a possibility that you could be dating other “great” men in the near future. It’s a lot more fun to look at it that way.


· Don’t set an alarm.

For men, there is no such thing as a biological clock. Don't pressure yourself into a steady relationship at any point in your life. Remember, it is better to be alone and happy than get stuck with the wrong partner.


· Is X=enemy?

Life becomes more complicated if your list of “exes” is directly proportional to your list of most hated people i.e. each and every ex automatically becomes an enemy. As much as possible, be friendly with your exes. The gay world is a small world. If you bump into each other, smile or even talk to them. Being able to let go of failed relationships is a sure sign of maturity.


· Get the “Miss Friendship” title.

For a lot of people, they think that their relationships didn’t work because of misgivings or personal weaknesses. Here’s a task. Start making friends with people coming from different background from yours. Ask and learn about their dating and mating perspectives. You would soon realize people’s behavior with their relationships is highly influenced by their unique background and personal history. Accept that every person has distinct and different sets of paradigms when it comes to dating. It’s not always our fault.


· Be your own best friend.

Make friends with yourself. Examine yourself honestly especially if you find it difficult to establish relationships. Do you have an attitude or a behavior that gets in the way in keeping relationships with other men? Knowing ourselves, our needs and our hang-ups should always be a continuous process if we want to grow as individuals and as future partners.


· The "right" guy is never a "perfect" guy

Should you find a “not-so-exciting” guy who is willing to go out with you, remind yourself, there is no prince charming created for each and one of us. If you want a long term partner in life, the guy would never meet all your expectations. After all, he is just human just like you are – capable of being imperfect and inconsistent.


Our happiness should never be dependent on another person. But that does not mean that we could happily live isolated lives away from others. Failed relationships from our past have certainly hurt us and have inevitably changed us. But we should never allow these failures to embitter us.

For me, our lives are like a series of short stories. Like a good story, good things and relationships come to an end. But one should never lose the passion and the zeal to always start a new story at any point in his life.

Taylor Swift and her Black Book of Men

Mirror, Mirror on the wall, whose the sluttiest bitch of them all....

Our dear Taylor is the 23 year old Kris Aquino version of relationships, while some of the women I know are dying from singlehood our dear princess made her flings and writing songs from them her bread and butter.

Young Girls, you may wanna analyze why you idolized this girl in the first place.

Let's meat.. err meet the guys, he dated and rumored she dated the last 5-8 years and the songs she made for them. Maybe someday she can write a song entitled "maybe I am the problem."

 1.)Brandon Borello
Tim McGraw', 'Our Song'  'Fifteen'

2. Sam Armstrong
Should’ve Said No

3.) Joe Jonas
dated July 2008-October 2008
"Last Kiss" and "Forever and Always"

4 lucas till
(March 2009-April 2009)
"You Belong With Me

5.) Taylor Lautner
dated (August 2009-December 2009)
Back To December

6.) John Mayer
dated (December 2009-February 2010)
Dear John

7 cory monteith
"Mine
dated (April 2010-May 2010)

8.) Jake Gyllenhaal
dated (October 2010-January 2011)
We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together, State of Grace, All Too Well, Girl at Home and The Moment I Knew The Last Time

9 chord overstreet 

hook up 2011

10 will anderson 

dated 2011

11 eddie redmayne

October 2011-January 2012

12 Zac Efron

February 2012-March 2012

13) Conner Kennedy

dated (July 2012-October 2012) 

“Begin Again”

impressive bulge ♥

14) Harry Styles 

dated December 2012-January 2013

"I Knew You Were Trouble

the list doesn't end here.

here's more boys link to our princess:

justin gaston

tim tebow

garrett hedlund

Patrick Schwarzenegger

no please not Patrick :(

8 Life Lessons We Can Learn from “My Husband’s Lover” from 8list.ph

article worth reading:

By Kel Fabie
from http://8list.ph

What the Hades is “My Husband’s Lover?!?”

I asked myself that, as my editor-in-chief told me to write about it, telling me how hot and controversial a topic it would be to write about. Not wanting to let on that there was actually a topic I had next to no idea about, I quietly accepted the assignment and proceeded to devour everything I could about the television show over the next few days.

Prior to really watching the show, I was going to write about how insipid, hackneyed and clichéd the entire concept of the show is.

But upon watching the show, I was compelled to instead write about how insipid, hackneyed, clichéd, and life-changing the entire concept of the show is. No, seriously.

8
While we might be poking fun at how horrible Lally’s (Carla Abellana) gaydar must be to have let Vincent (Tom Rodriguez) and Eric (Dennis Trillo) keep this going on right under her nose for so long, it also makes us realize that gone are the days where our concept of a gay man is exclusively about doing your best mid-’80s Roderick Paulate impression.

the lesson:
Being gay is not being effeminate. Being effeminate is not being gay. Homosexuality is far more than just the stereotypes we’ve constructed of it.

7.
One of the most striking lines of dialogue I got from the series probably came from Eric’s mom, Sol (Chandra Romero): “Let’s not fool ourselves here, Vincent–bakla ka, bakla ang anak ko. Ang pagkakaiba, hindi niloloko ng anak ko ang sarili niya! The moment you decided to have a wife, nagpatali ka sa kasinungalingan. Either panindigan mo ang asawa mo, o kumawala ka sa kanya para maging totoo ka kay Eric at sasarili mo. Iyan lang ang choices mo, Vincent, dahil bilang ina, hindi ako papayag na pumasok sa komplikadong relasyon ang anak ko!”

the lesson:
Regardless of gender roles, infidelity should be treated as inexcusable.

6.
As I watched, it made me think: if we were in a more accepting society, could this betrayal of trust have simply never happened? If society did not frown upon homosexuality, would it have made a difference? In this case, I realized it absolutely would. If gay people had the option to actually get with the people they love, rather than be pressured to subscribe to heteronormative roles, there will be a lot less… nasty surprises along the way. -

the lesson:
Societal pressure for heteronormativity can actually cause more harm than good. You simply cannot pray the gay away.

5.
It feels like the timing of having this TV show come out couldn’t have been any better. With RH Law debates ongoing and our lawmakers lining up for the next big legislative battlefield in divorce, marriage equality is no longer a far-off discussion along the way. It’s amazing how a good chunk of the characters take homosexuality as simply a matter of fact, rather than overemphasizing it as making infidelity “worse” or trivializing it by making it merely a point of humor.

the lesson:
Philippine TV is not as “bereft of ideas” as we like to pretend it is, while hailing the same country that produced Jersey Shore and Honey Boo Boo as the be-all and end-all of quality television. -


4.
It’s nice to know that even if the concept of infidelity is a very tired and rehashed theme, there are still facets of it left unexplored. Sans any value judgments, you have to hand it to the writers for that stroke of brilliance.

the lesson:
Gay people can make the mundane fabulous again.

3
One of the key scenes hinged on the plot point that Vincent was keeping his phone well out of Lally’s reach. In fact, Sandra (Glydel Mercardo), Lally’s mom, was lecturing Lally that where there’s smoke, there’s fire, and Vincent is most likely keeping something from her.

In the thick of this treatise on the unwritten commandments about phone privacy and trust issues, Danny (Kevin Santos) offers to install Candy Crush on Sandra’s phone.

the lesson:
A fine balance between trust and privacy needs to be struck in any given relationship, but all of that takes a backseat if you haven’t yet installed Candy Crush on your phone. Go do it. Now.

2
The Catholic Bishop’s Conference of the Philippines claims that due to the homosexual themes of the series, they are “scrutinizing”My Husband’s Lover.

The dictionary defines the word “scrutinize” as “to examine or inspect closely and thoroughly.” #AlamNa

the lesson:
It is best to choose your words carefully.

1
Throughout my research for this list, there is only one lesson I could absolutely not deny, and I say this without the least bit of insecurity about my masculinity for it is very much the truth… -

the lesson:
Dennis Trillo is truly a beautiful, beautiful man.